miércoles, 18 de septiembre de 2013

4 Obstacles to Decluttering — and How to Beat Them

Letting go can be hard, but it puts you more in control of your home's stuff and style. See if any of these notions are holding you back


My husband and I began dating when we were still children. He was 16 and I was 15, back in the olden days when people still talked on the phone and wrote letters. By the time we got married and had three kids, we had almost 20 years of correspondence. I came across our box of cards and letters a few years ago and read it in one sitting. Afterward I had the urge to travel back in time and smother my teenage self with a pillow and maybe Paul's too while I was at it. Failing that, I considered burning the box. I called Torey, my sister, instead.
“Throw them away,” she said without a second thought. Torey is a neatnik and the tiniest bit twitchy when it comes to cleaning and organization. “If reading those letters brings you down, get rid of them.”

Next I called Nathan, my younger brother, and he recommended the opposite: “How many people in their mid-30s have a 20-year correspondence with their spouse? For archival purposes alone, you need to keep them.”

Finally I called Tanner, my older brother. We laughed about the conflicting advice Torey and Nathan gave, and then he was silent for a moment. “How do you know how far you’ve come if you can’t remember where you started?” he asked. That resonated with me. I tucked the letters back into their box, and there they remained, untouched, until the day they burned in a house fire. And I have never given them a second thought.

Looking back I can see I really wanted to get rid of them but didn’t think I ought to — that was the tension. It wasn’t that I didn’t know what I wanted to do, it was that what I wished to do conflicted with what I thought I should.

This is why decluttering (and losing weight and managing money) can be so painful; it’s the tension from the many feelings, often in conflict. Simply being aware of what’s underneath the surface can help us through. There are some common reasons we hold onto things we don’t want out of a sense of obligation; see of any of the ones here resonate with you.
1. "It’s a family heirloom." Even if the value is only sentimental, how many things do you hold onto because they were your grandfather’s or your aunt’s, dentist’s cousin’s? My dear friend Sharon inherited her grandmother’s china. In the plus column it was beautiful, valuable and from a beloved relative. On the minus side, it wasn’t really Sharon’s style, and it reminded her of some painful parts of her childhood. She decided there were better ways for her to remember her grandmother, and wrapped up the china in a big box and gave it to a mutual friend who collects the same pattern and for whom it was a surprise and a delight.

2. "It was a gift." After our fire we were flooded with donations. In the first weeks, I sorted through truckloads of things people had given us. I was so thankful for the incredible generosity and, at the same time, there were so many things that didn’t fit or that we didn’t need. It wasn’t long before I got over any qualms I had about passing things on to various charities. Now I assume a gift is truly mine to do with as I please.

3. "I may need it someday." This comes up across the spectrum, from overbuying consumables to storing extra furniture. This could be the biggest one of all, and at the bottom of it is fear. A subcategory of this is: "I’m not actually sure what it is, but it may be important!" A few months ago I was sorting through a drawer in my desk and came across a random screw. It was thick and substantial; I knew it belonged to something.And then I recognized the old and familiar tension forming in the pit of my stomach with the thought, "Keep it! Keep it! You may need it!" I’m happy to say I reminded myself I had survived losing everything and was not going to allow an anonymous bit of hardware to freak me out.
4. "I paid a lot of money for it." That’s a big one. If you’re in the midst of a big purge, I don’t recommend trying to sell your things, for a couple of reasons. First, it will probably slow you down. Second, when you feel like you've wasted money on something you don't need, you probably aren't going to make enough from its sale to take away the sting. It may seem counterintuitive, but the most positive thing to do may be to let go, give it away and move on. It's a paradox that the more we let go, the more control we gain.
Ultimately, that's what this is all about: taking control of your home instead of being subordinate to your possessions. For some, when we talk about minimalism, it conjures up images of stark interiors, the idea of not having enough or of things being taken away.

To me minimalism ishaving what you love, but not a bit more than you can maintain. How that looks in your home may differ from how it looks in mine. It comes down to creating the home you long for. Life, like art, is all about removing and editing to make room for what you truly want and need.

How to Create an Inventory, Whether You're Naturally Organized or Not

Documenting your home items is essential, even if disaster seems unimaginable. And it may be easier than you think. 

You may be surprised to know that losing all of my earthly possessions was the easy part of having an arsonist set my house on fire. The hard part was wrangling with the insurance company while trying to build a new house.

Have you seen those insurance commercials where a kindly insurance adjuster is at the scene of a disaster, immediately cutting a generous check to the devastated homeowner? If you have, and that's what you think happens, I'm sorry to tell you it's not quite like that. 

Imagine you've been hit by a car. You miraculously survive and desperately need medical attention. The paramedics arrive — O happy day! After a brief examination, they inform you they really want to help — and they absolutely will ... as soon as you complete a tiny little 5K. (Full disclosure: It's going to turn into an Ironman triathlon.) On your mark, get set, go! You find yourself jogging. "Don't worry," they assure you. "We'll be right beside you every step of the way." And they will ... thwacking you in the head with a 2-by-4.

That gives you an idea of what it's like settling with an insurance company after a house fire. 
"I'm sorry," you may be thinking, "but that's not how it will be for me, because I'm insured for a zillion dollars."

We too had great coverage and ended up with a very good settlement — ours is actually a success story. And here's the thing: Take a look at your policy. Right before the dollar amount of your coverage, there are two very important words: "up to." As in "up to a zillion dollars." The difference between that and an actual zillion dollars is profound. (See Ironman and 2-by-4 thwackings above.)

How an Inventory Can Help You

I hope anyone reading this never has to face a house fire, but statistically speaking some of you will, and I'd love to make a terrible experience a little easier.

Here's the secret: Before your house burns down, you need to make an inventory. That is, you need to make a list of every single item in your home. Bonus secret: After your house burns down — and I hope it never does — hire a a public adjuster. (See good-settlement success story above.)
Just reading that may have caused your eyes to roll back into your head, and I'm sorry, but the only way to avoid needing to make an inventory is by avoiding a house fire, an earthquake, a flood, a hurricane or a tornado. I'm here to tell you that's not always possible, and creating an inventory before your house burns down (is shaken apart, floods, blows away etc.) is soooo much easier than doing so after.

The Organized Person's Way to Make an Inventory

First we're going to look at the Naturally Organized way to create an inventory.

My friend Jane is one of the most organized people in the world and an insurance adjuster's worst nightmare. First of all she actually has an inventory, and then it's broken down into mind-bogglingly detailed categories. Here they are:

"Appliances (mostly major, but including air conditioners), artwork, brewery, china (and all butler's-pantry-type serveware), clothes, electronics, furniture, jewelry, kitchen (small appliances go here), linens, lamps and clocks, miscellaneous (bookends, wastebaskets, Christmas decor), rugs, sporting goods, tools, utility (ironing board, scale, telephones, lawnmower)."

Jane runs a bed-and-breakfast out of her hundred-year-old home, and she acknowledges this affects the complexity of her inventory. "Clearly, there's more here than most places. We've got lots of categories because it's easier to find things and update. Some categories overlap a bit, like miscellaneous and utilities."
Here's a fairly minimalistic corner, but I see several hundred dollars in books alone, not to mention the bed, bedding, light, curtains and hardware.

And that's not all. She also keeps separate inventories for books, videos and music as well as separate lists for electrical panel, major repair, redecorating, gardening and major medical expenses plus lending.

All of this is in searchable Excel documents, and each item has columns for category, room, item, brand, model, serial, price or value, and date acquired. The only addition I would suggest is one more column to indicate whether the item was a gift or purchased, because the insurance company will want to know.

Jane assures me it's an easy 15-minute update every year; she likes to do it first thing after the holidays, when she naturally acquires new things.

When I asked her how she backs up the info, she said, "It's a computer document, butusually there's a recent downloaded copy that we store in our safe. Sometimes we get sloppy, but it's never very far outdated." I can only imagine what "sloppy" looks like to Jane. A box of cotton swabs omitted? I can't even hazard a guess.

Inventorying for the Not Naturally Organized

Naturally Organized readers, you may be clucking your tongues and noting a couple of categories you've neglected in your own inventories. You're welcome.

And now I have something special for my Not Naturally Organized friends. We all know you are never, ever going to write down and categorize everything you own. And that's OK.

Here's what I want you to do: Grab a smart phone or a camera, turn on the video and take a slow tour of your entire home, inside and out. Email yourself the results. In a matter of minutes you will have put yourself a thousand times ahead of the game.
Run the numbers on what it would cost to replace all of these small items. It adds up fast.

It doesn't take much more effort to do a really thorough job. Take a little time. Walk slowly through the house, room by room. Do close-ups of items of particular value. Turn things over to show labels or marks. Slowly pan your bookshelves. Even if you don't get every title, this will give you an idea of the number of hardcovers versus paperbacks, not to mention any other items.

Open drawers and closet doors and lift up bedskirts. Don't forget the basement and the garage or attic as well as any outbuildings. It doesn't matter if the areas are a mess. Odds are, you'll never, ever need to look at this again, but a few of you will, and I guarantee that you will be unutterably glad to have this. Don't forget to film your landscaping. Our claim for my gardens and yards was thousands and thousands of dollars.

Special note: If you rent rather than own your home, make sure to purchase renter's insurance. It is very reasonable, and you can get it through almost any insurance agent. And then make sure to do an inventory!

Here's the alternative: Shut your eyes. OK, now open them. Where's your stuff? All gone! You want it back? Alrighty! Actually, that's not going to happen, but write down whatever you want to replace. What's that? Some things can never be replaced. Sorry! But tick-tock — we don't have all day. Thwack! Thwack! Thwack!

And that's a picture of a good settlement.
My former front door.

Years ago I read an article in a magazine telling what to do before your house burns down; it was by a writer who had been through a fire. He had not been adequately insured; he learned too late and he didn't have an inventory, either. He broke down the differences in insurance and actually recommended taking a video and storing it at a friends' house or in a safety deposit box.

That night I talked to my husband about our homeowners' insurance. I wanted to make sure we were properly covered. I didn't give the inventory another thought.

This was years and years ago, before digital cameras, back in the olden days when you needed a separate video camera, and ours had recently broken. I wasn't really worried about it. I mean, it's one thing to make sure you're adequately insured, but why go overboard? I couldn't believe my house would ever burn down. Who could?

Vinegar and Voilà: Clean Your House the Natural Way

Ditch the commercial cleaners for nontoxic, inexpensive and versatile white vinegar

Many homeowners strive for a healthier home — whether that means choosing ecofriendly materials for a remodel or greener products for everyday life. For me, finding healthier, more effective and budget-friendly cleaning alternatives is at the top of my list. Fortunately, effective nontoxic options have been around for centuries. Many of these cleaners, including vinegar, are already in your closet.

Vinegar is one of the most versatile and effective household cleaners. At pennies per ounce, it's also one of the most inexpensive cleaners on the market. Simply mix 1 cup of water and ¼ cup distilled white vinegar in a spray bottle. This basic mixture can be used for most cleaning chores, with additional natural elements added to tackle tougher jobs.

Not too fond of the smell? Don't worry, the smell dissipates as the vinegar dries.
Bathroom. Vinegar can be used to clean the bathroom from top to bottom.

• Use the basic mixture on the toilet and tile floors; and on hard water stains, film and soap residue on the shower and sink. Just spray on, scrub and wipe clean.

• To deep clean grout, combine 2 tablespoons of lemon juice, ¼ cup vinegar, ¼ cup warm water and 2 tablespoons borax. Apply, let soak and scrub with a toothbrush.

Tip: Have a clogged shower head or drain? Soak the shower head in vinegar or use this method to unclog the drain.
Kitchen. The kitchen is another room that sees the full benefits of vinegar — the basic mix can clean virtually every surface in this room.
  • Use the basic mix to clean and disinfect the refrigerator, surfaces, tile floors and cutting boards.
  • For sparkling dishes, pour 2 cups of distilled white vinegar in the bottom of the dishwasher in addition to regular dishwasher detergent and wash with a full cycle.
  • Clean and deodorize the kitchen drain by pouring 2 cups of boiling water followed by 2 cups of white distilled vinegar down each drain.
Laundry. Use vinegar to soften and lift stains from clothes in the laundry room.
  • Add two cups of distilled white vinegar to the rinse cycle to remove soap residue and leave laundry soft and fresh.
  • Lightly sponge distilled white vinegar onto deodorant and wine stains on 100 percent cotton, cotton polyester and permanent press fabrics. Note: This must be done within 24 hours of the wine stain.
  • Deodorize your washing machine by adding 2 cups of distilled white vinegar to an empty machine and turn it on to a full cycle.
  • Remove dark burn marks from an iron plate with a paste of equal parts white distilled vinegar and salt. Rub the paste onto the cooled iron plate and wipe clean.
Living room, hall and bedroom. These living spaces often take the brunt of household abuse; use vinegar to whip them back into shape!

• Wash no-wax floors, woodwork, doors, walls and blinds with the basic mixture.

• For a streak-free shine, wash windows with equal parts warm water and vinegar. Wipe dry with a soft, lint-free cloth.

• Lift new stains from carpets, rugs and upholstery with a mixture of 1 teaspoon of liquid detergent, 1 teaspoon of vinegar and 1 pint of warm water. Pour the mixture onto the stain, scrub with a soft brush or towel and blot dry. Repeat until stain is removed. Note: Read your carpet manufacturer's label beforehand, and test the mixture on a small inconspicuous place.

• Pesky water rings can be removed by rubbing a mixture of equal parts olive oil and vinegar onto the stain. Buff with the grain, and polish after stain is removed.

Baking Soda: The Amazing All-Natural Cleanser You Already Own

Battle grime, banish odors and freshen clothes with this common nontoxic cupboard staple

Fluffy pastries and scrumptious cookies might be the first things that come to mind when you think of baking soda, but this ingredient is far more than a baking staple. Baking soda, or sodium bicarbonate, is a powerful cleanser that should be a mainstay in your kitchen pantry and cleaning arsenal. This inexpensive, all-natural ingredient is neck and neck with vinegar as one of the most nontoxic and versatile household cleaning agents.
Ready to start cleaning? All you need is ¼ cup of baking soda dissolved into 1 quart of warm water to tackle many household cleaning chores.
Bedroom, living room and hall:

• 
Before you vacuum the carpets or clean your upholstery, sprinkle them with baking soda and let it sit for 15 minutes to remove any odors.
• Deodorize your closet by placing an opened box of baking soda on a shelf.
• Clean children's toys with the aforementioned basic mixture and a sponge. Rinse and let them dry.
• Deodorize stuffed animals with a light dusting of baking soda; let it sit 15 minutes, then dust or vacuum it off.
• Freshen shoes with a light dusting of baking soda on the inner soles.
Kitchen:
  • Use the basic mixture and a sponge to clean all kitchen surfaces.
  • Rid your fridge or pantry of odors by placing an opened box of baking soda on a back shelf.
  • Dust your stainless steel sink with baking soda and scrub for a sparkling shine.
  • Deodorize trash cans and recycling bins with a sprinkling of baking soda on the inside of the cans. Every now and then, rinse the cans with 1 cup of baking soda dissolved into 1 gallon of warm water.
  • Get your silver sparkling with a paste made from 3 parts baking soda and 1 part water.
  • For stubborn stains on plastic storage containers, soak for 15 minutes in 4 parts baking soda and 1 part warm water. Scrub, rinse and dry.
  • Rid your fruits and vegetables of dirt and insecticides by washing them in a sink full of water and ¼ cup of baking soda, then rinse.
  • Remove baked-on residue on pots and pans by sprinkling on baking soda. Add warm water and dish soap, let soak for 15 minutes and wash clean. 
  • Extinguish small cooking fires by sprinkling baking soda directly onto the fire.
Laundry:

• Brighten your clothes by adding 1 cup of baking soda to the wash.
• For extra-fluffy sheets and towels, add ½ cup of baking soda to the rinse cycle.
• Banish stains with a paste made from 6 tablespoons of baking soda and ½ cup of warm water. Apply to the stain, rub and launder. For the toughest stains, let the paste sit for one or two hours. (Always check for color fastness.)
• Freshen babies' burp cloths by sprinkling on baking soda, rubbing it in and washing as usual.
Bathroom:

• 
Clean floors with a bucket of warm water and ½ cup of baking soda.
• Use the basic mixture to clean your bathroom surfaces or sprinkle dry baking soda on tough-to-clean stains.
• Clean hairbrushes and combs once per month by soaking them in warm water and 1 tablespoon of baking soda.
• Deodorize and clean the toilet with a sprinkling of baking soda on the inside of the bowl; scrub and flush.
• For rust stains in the shower, sink or toilet bowl, pour in 1 cup of vinegar and ½ cup of baking soda. Scrub and rinse.
Outdoors:
  • Before storing your patio furniture for the winter, clean it with baking soda and a wet sponge.
  • Clean grime and mildew off pool toys with the basic mixture.
  • Blast oil and grease stains in the garage or driveway by pouring baking soda directly on them. Scrub with a wet brush and rinse.
  • Battle icy walkways with a sprinkling of baking soda.

El diario quehacer del hogar, es el único trabajo que sólo se nota, cuando no esta hecho.